It's not fair

I made the mistake of reading the posts on Cooper Stone's support page. I can barely type as the tears flow. Clicking on the picture of this daddy and son, all that came to mind was "It isn't fair." Thousands and thousands of children are ignored, abused, and abandoned by their fathers in America on a daily basis. Then you have fathers like Shannon who give everything they have to be the men that their children need. He had taken his son to the Ballpark. Watching a team that made the World Series last year. They sat in a section that is known to be hotter than he** without any shade just so they would have a shot at catching a ball. Every little boys dream. Shannon had yelled for J.H to throw the ball and rarely does this player ever do that but for some reason he did. He threw short. Shannon reached down as far as he could and it caught him off balance. He fell to his death. The sweet, precious child witnessing it all. I can't even imagine the nightmares that will follow for that child but I pray God removes the memory and replaces it with nothing but good. I just don't understand why bad things happen to good people. I know, we've all asked that question. Ironically it brings to light the reason I was going to blog this weekend to begin with. It's been nearly a year since we lost Kynadi. I read Amanda's facebook post today which ended with "IT ISN'T FAIR." She's right. It's not fair. I shouldn't be picking out a sympathy card tomorrow. I should be dragging the kids to Waco for her 2nd birthday. My best friend shouldn't be forced to pick out birthday flowers for her grave. A day doesn't go by that I don't think of Kynadi. I don't believe that we will ever get an answer as to why God calls innocent babies and good daddy's & mommy's home. I think by the time we get to heaven we will be so in awe that the questions will never even cross our mind. I just hope that the suffering doesn't go in vain. You never know what good you have until it is gone. I will say that watching Amanda go through this has made me a better parent. I stop doing the dishes when Allie wants to read a book. Or I forget the laundry to play trains. Possibly this sweet little boy will go on to do phenomenal things in his fathers name. Perhaps a father distant from his children, watching ESPN Thursday night will realize what he's done and will take on an active role in the lives of his children. I certainly hope that through witnessing others suffering we are able to make better of our own lives. The words of John echo in my mind...Peace I leave you; my peace I give to you. Do not let your heart be troubled, nor let it be fearful." 14:27